Thursday, August 27, 2009

Today is my one year Band-iversary

One year ago I let a surgeon by the name of Richard Symmonds -yes, the irony is too much, I know! - put the lapband in me. A year ago today I knew my life would change.

I sat with a friend yesterday and we were talking about weight and how she's toying with the idea of getting the band, and I told her it was the best thing I ever did. We both cenonfessed we don't have will power- "Hello, my names Melissa and I love food!" I told that, yes, I got the band because I've yo-yo dieted my entire life - am the only one who remembers GanGan taking me to her dieting group when I was probably 10 years old? - and that I can't do it alone, and I admit that. I am sitting here admitting that I am taking an easier way out, and I am ok with it. I am "cheating" - I wasn't blessed with great metabolism, both sides of the family loved to eat and were over-weight.
I think some "bandsters" might get offended by that 'cheating' comment, but I don't care really... it's the way I feel, and again, I am ok with that. I need the help. I don't feel that I should have to give up everything - I've done it my entire life already, and damit, I'm tired of it. The funny thing is, both of my doctors, and the shrink found my commentary very funny when I told them my views of this.
I want to be able to have a piece of cake on my future kids first birthday party. If I'm out with friends and they have dessert, I want to be able to share a piece with them. I don't want to give up Mexican food (and it wouldn't happen! *lol*) - I already gave you my Dr. Pepper!
No, I don't want to get down to the doctors recommended weight of 150 lbs - it's creepy. I'm 5'7", and the idea of not having beautiful curves, my big butt, my boobs are already gone (hello boob job one day!) just makes me sad - it's pathetic that the world we live in, having your bones stick out is what we consider beautiful. I don't. My husband doesn't - he said he'd be happy if I didn't lose another pound - and honestly, I'd be ok too, but only if they took the saggy skin. *lol*
When I was 16-17 I popped Ripped Fuel like candy for 1.5 years and went from a 24-14 and dropped to around 190-ish and you know what? I didn't care, I honestly wasn't happy - it took a lot to maintain. I ate a small something for breakfast with a coke, nothing for lunch, and when I worked nights I had a large fat-free smoothie for dinner. Does that sound like living? Not to me. Some bansters live off of that not, and it works for them, great. It doesn't for me. I want to live AND eat. You can have both, and I'm learning to balance them out.

So, no, I'm probably not the "normal banster", and I'm ok with that. I'm the fat kid who didn't like being uber fat, but doesn't want to completly change who she is. :)
I found this on my harddrive, and it's from Christmas 2006 when I was at my heaviest. We didnt even own a scale at that time, so I have no idea what I was.

This was the middle of 2007.

August 27th, 2008 - the morning after I took the bandages off. I found out I'm allergic from the adhesive, obviously. *lol*


Me - July 2009. Happy.
The day of surgery I was 275, and today I'm 240. Sure, I could be a lot less, but I'm choosing to lose it at a slower pace and I'm happy. :)
Me, July 2009.





15 comments:

  1. I think you look great! Being happy with yourself is hard, and I think it's amazing that you are! Keep enjoying dessert. Why live life miserable without it?! :-)

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  2. You look great. And, I definitely think slow and steady is the way to go. And, who can live without Mexican food and dessert?

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  3. Richard Symmonds. LMAO!!!
    You Look great! I hope we get to meet one day! Let me know when you guys will be in P'cola again and we will have to meet up! Amy, Lacey, And Seniorita Bandita are all trying to set a date of when we can all get togeather you need to join us!!!!!

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  4. Congrats on your weight loss! I admire your honesty and it really helps people like me who will be getting the lap band in the near future! I meet with my surgeon this Thursday to plan a surgery date! I just started my own blog to write down my weight loss thoughts and I would love for you to follow! Good luck in the future with your weight loss to come!

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  5. Congrats on your weight loss! I admire your honesty and it really helps people like me who will be getting the lap band in the near future! I meet with my surgeon this Thursday to plan a surgery date! I just started my own blog to write down my weight loss thoughts and I would love for you to follow! Good luck in the future with your weight loss to come!

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  6. Congrats and thanks for your honest thoughts and experiances!Thanks for stopping by and visiting my blog as well..Good luck on the giveaway!

    betty

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  7. Good for you! I think you look amazing and have a great attitude which makes you even more beautiful. You should be happy just as you are :) Congrats on the weight loss.

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  8. so glad you made it by my blog. Thanks for visint and entering the giveaways make sure you don't miss any of the 11 I have two more in the morning! :)

    WAHOO!!!!

    Goodluck!!!

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  9. good luck to u nothingbetter than a smile of someone whos just as beautiful on the outside as she is on the inside your story will help many good luck 2 u and thanks 4 entering my giveaway

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  10. This is quite an achievement! Good for you! What a year it must have been, and looking back on photos to bring all the emotions back to you. You should totally proud of the progress you have made no matter what pace you take, and don't feel you have to defend that! What is most important, as you stated last - you are happy! I think Dr. Pepper would have been the LAST thing I would be gripping to :) Love that stuff!

    Thank you for stopping by my blog during the End Of Summer giveaway. I am sorry that you did not win the contest. However I invite you back because I do these give aways on a regular basis. Thank you for your comments and look forward to any further interest you may have in AprilAccents.

    My personal blog:
    www.alt-ourhiddentreasure.blogspot.com

    My boutique blog:
    www.aprilaccents.blogspot.com

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  11. You look beautiful! The scale is only a number, don't let it rule your life!

    I found out I was allergic to the adhesive tape after I had my c-section - the pain was almost worse than the incision!

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  12. I just wanted to check in with you. I couldn't find an email address but you won one of my giveaways for the Etsy Event. If you could email me at JosiahsMommy123@gmail.com I'll pass your info on to the shop owner. Thanks!

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  13. Congrats on your weight loss. You have SUCH a great smile! Thanks for stopping by! I'm so excited you entered for some granola!

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  14. You go girl!!! I lost 40 lbs and it feels great :)

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