A few weekends ago we were at a friends house hanging out when we'd some how got onto the subject of being a good wife/husband.
Now let me just say that the guy who's house we were at is very anit-marriage, he's 54, been divorced twice (if I remember right), and got married to his long term girlfriend in July because of medical insurance reasons. Oh, and he does love her. *lol*
Anyway, so Rich was talking about how my Mom always makes Dad's plate at dinner, and us girls were taught to do the same for him if she was busy or not home. And even to this day, when I go home and I'm in the kitchen I'll make Dad's plate.
Mom gets up earlier than Dad (ok, so she's a night owl!) and makes his coffee pot. In winter she goes out and cranks his truck so the windows can thaw and it's warm when he gets inside.
These are things I saw growing up, and was programmed in my head that that's what I'm supposed to do with my spouse. And I do. I try.
In winter I go out and crank the car so the windows thaw and it's warm. I make sure his jacket, beanie, face cover and gloves are either by the door when he leaves or are in the car. I make his coffee. Pack his lunch on days that he actually takes something more than a heat-up meal.
I try to make his plate, but a lot of the time he likes to tweak it in his own way and makes it himself. We always try to eat together, and sometimes will hold off eating until the other is ready - not so much now considering I'm hungry all the time. *lol*
(I remember one time when we'd gone home to visit and I made Dad's plate and Mom got onto be because I didn't make Rich's. I think that's honestly one of Rich's favorite stories to tell for some reason.)
One of my biggest thing that just somehow got made into a ritual is the door wave. When he leaves in the morning we give three kisses, he leaves and I stand at the door until he pulls out of the driveway, where he blinks his lights twice, I blow a kiss and wave. As he drives by he waves, I wave and that's that.
When he's almost home me and Bocephus are either standing on the porch waiting for him, or just inside the door. Now this is Bo's favorite time of day, and he knows when Rich should be home, and waits by the door until I say "Daddy's home!" where he promptly runs out the door, ears standing and jumps all around. It's cute.
We've both commented about how it's odd that I'm not at the door ready to kiss him goodbye or greet him after a long day - and it is. It's become this "thing" that we do because we want to, we like doing it.
After we told our guy friend that, he said it's stupid- that Rich is a big boy and can crank his own car in the mornings or just get in the thing and wait for it to get warm. He's big enough to make sure he has all his stuff together, lunch and coffee made and can do it all without me. Sure, we knows this, he can - but he doesn't have to.
Lord knows he'd give us hell if he knew the things Rich did for me when he doesn't have to. *lol*
We both know that after the baby gets here it'll be harder to do those things at first, but we really hope to keep it up. It really is the little things that make us happy, and waving goodbye from the door is one of those things.