By 30, you should have:
- One old boyfriend you can imagine going back to and one who reminds you of how far you’ve come. ((I don't have one I can imagine going back to, but I do wonder how life would have been - aka: probably not great since he couldn't keep his keep his zipper up while dating. Haha! And I have one that reminds me of how far I've come, that's for sure.))
- A decent piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in your family. ((Does my mattress count? We LOVE our mattress, and we got it brand new.))
- Something perfect to wear if the employer or man of your dreams wants to see you in an hour.
- A purse, a suitcase and an umbrella you’re not ashamed to be seen carrying. ((I'm a purse whore, so I've got that down. I do want some awesome luggage and a "happy" umbrella.))
- A youth you’re content to move beyond. ((Amen!))
- A past juicy enough that you’re looking forward to retelling it in your old age.((Bahaha - you have no idea!))
- The realization that you are actually going to have an old age—and some money set aside to help fund it.
- An e-mail address, a voice mailbox and a bank account—all of which nobody has access to but you. ((Rich has access to everything, and vise-versa.))
- A résumé that is not even the slightest bit padded.
- One friend who always makes you laugh and one who lets you cry. ((I have some of the most AMAZING friends, I love them oh-so-much!))
- A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill and a black lace bra. ((All but the bra- I hate those things.))
- Something ridiculously expensive that you bought for yourself, just because you deserve it. ((Again, purses make me happy.))
- The belief that you deserve it. ((Oh, I do. I may not get to have them but once in a blue moon now, and trust me, I miss getting a new purse. But, I know I deserve it.))
- A skin-care regimen, an exercise routine and a plan for dealing with those few other facets of life that don’t get better after 30.
- A solid start on a satisfying career, a satisfying relationship and all those other facets of life that do get better. ((I'm a SAHM who's learning as she goes. I've also fought for my marriage when hell came barrelling through it when he came home with PTSD.))
By 30, you should know:
- How to fall in love without losing yourself. ((That one is tough, and I didn't learn it til a few years ago when I fell in love with Rich all over again.))
- How you feel about having kids. ((It took having Braxton for me to realize it - but, hey, I'm ready for another!))
- How to quit a job, break up with a man and confront a friend without ruining the friendship. ((I can do the friendship one, the rest, nah.))
- When to try harder and when to walk away. ((That takes years of practice, and I'm still learning.))
- How to kiss in a way that communicates perfectly what you would and wouldn’t like to happen next. ((Yes sir!))
- The names of: the secretary of state, your great-grandmother and the best tailor in town.
- How to live alone, even if you don’t like to. ((Deployment will teach ya that!))
- How to take control of your own birthday.
- That you can’t change the length of your calves, the width of your hips or the nature of your parents.
- That your childhood may not have been perfect, but it’s over. ((You take the good and the bad.))
- What you would and wouldn’t do for money or love. ((We've choosen to be happy and not make a lot of money instead of being unhappy, apart and making a bunch. WE come first.))
- That nobody gets away with smoking, drinking, doing drugs or not flossing for very long. ((Oh I so can't drink anywhere near as much as I used to - and don't see how I did back then. Ouch.))
- Who you can trust, who you can’t and why you shouldn’t take it personally. ((That's another one that takes years of practice. I still hold hope you can trust just about anyone, but I know in my heart you can't.))
- Not to apologize for something that isn’t your fault. ((Amen!))
- Why they say life begins at 30.
I guess I've still got a while to go. Turning 30 used to freak me out - and, in a way, it still does, but not like it did before Braxton. Having B turned my life upside down, inside out, and then pooped on it - all in a good way.
Now when I look at 30 it makes me want to be wiser - not neccessarily older, come on - but to not make the youth filled mistakes I did. I've spent all of my 20's married to Rich, thinking of going into our 30's just makes it that much sweeter.